98 Taiji I

Meng Shang was being training with the City Lord himself, and I entered his meditation room. I also asked if he could buy many cheap artifacts with the money I received, I didn’t care about how cheap they were, but the nature of their energy. One half had to be yang attributes and the other one yin one. He was surprised by the request but he did it, he even gave me some not so cheap artifacts from his own vault.

When he send me the artifacts, they were like a little mountain, not even in my house we had so much trinkets like this; some were so beautiful that it was a shame what their purpose was.

“First it’s time for you to ascend to the quasi-divine realm, then I will help you to complete the second stage of Using demons and gods alike. When we complete that step, you will be different of most of cultivators. Some changes you will notice right away, but other you will have to wait. But for now, it’s time for you to rise up.”

First I had to absorb all the yin and yang of the artifacts. That took me some days, but when I finally did it, my body felt like a mess. Both were trying to fight each other in my body and were destroying most of my inner self. Only the soul tree was save. “Master is this really necessary?” She saw me but didn’t say anything about that, only that it was time to me to stop that fight.

“Me? —I asked shocked— Master I don’t know how to do it. It too much for me to handle it.”

“Then you will die” was the only answer that she said.

I knew that she was telling the truth. So I entered my inner self and saw the disaster that that was me. How could I let them stop fighting? It seemed impossible. “Sit down and contemplate the beauty of the destruction —my Master said—, feel it, and think about it.”

I sat down and saw. The spectacle was indeed amazing. Those two forces were struggling to win, but neither could do it. It was like a dance of fires. But why did they had to fight? Especially in me? I have already absorb both types in my body, but that time it was with the help of my Master, it was difficult, but it had an order. This time it was like fighting nature, it was impossible. Why do they have to fight?

Both had equal strength and both were destroying my body. Why they had to do this? Why they couldn’t be channeled as before. It’s true that my Master helped me before, but I also had experience with them, but it seemed pointless to try it.. “Master, I…”

“Don’t say it. Don’t dare to say it —she said quite angry—. Analyze the destruction, think. It’s not the first time you do this, but this time your life is in jeopardy. I will not help you. This is only something that only you could do it. Think!”

It was not my first time doing it? What she was talking about? I vomited blood. The fighting was now affecting also my life. I was scared and I knew that she wouldn’t help me. I was afraid to die, and tried to analyze what I was seeing, but I didn’t understand anything. I only knew that I was frightened and in that moment I understood what she was talking about. This sensation of fear, it’s something that I had felt before, the first time I meditated in the dark place of my inner self. That’s what I had to do, but I didn’t know how.

I kept seeing the destruction, now I began to feel the pain of my body. What I had to do? At that time when I realized who I was, I could change the flow of my vital qi, but that was easy because it was part of me. These forces were not, they were strangers in my body.

I tried to use my river qi to guide them to the tree, but the river began to been absorbed by the forces. They began to suck all the river and in a few minutes it would be dry and I would be death. What could I do? I thought on a stupid solution. If they were absorbing my qi, why I couldn’t try to absorve them.

I did it, but only a little and it was not enough, but I least now I knew that It was possible. When the soul tree began absorb the bits of energy it began to bright. It didn’t do anything more, and both forces keep struggling each other while killing me.

I knew that the techniques my Master had teach me, had the power to control it, and I knew that I couldn’t do it because of myself. What was stopping me? Why I couldn’t absorb enough of both energies? My eyes began to have tears of blood, and the pain began to be higher each minute.

“You know who you are, but know you have to discover what you are.” said my Master with a worried face. She had given me clues the whole process but I couldn’t understand it. Last time I discovered part of who I was, but what I was? No, that never occurred to me.

I was a human, a cultivator, but that was who I was. What I was had to be different. I didn’t understood the question, I was what? An animal? I saw again my soul tree, and began to think about it. What was exactly the soul tree? It was part of me, but what exactly it was? And why it needed to grow? It absorbed yin and yang, and made possible to my vital qi run as mighty as it was now.

The tree was the last piece of the clue, but it was difficult to deciphering. Yin, yang, qi and the soul tree, what was there connection?

I was really lost.

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